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Jokes | Knock-Knocks | Blonde Jokes

JOKES

RadDebi asks...
What did the camel wear when he went into the jungle to hunt??

Answer: Camelflage

Nan Giridaran
What stays in the corner and goes all around the world at the same time?

A Stamp

From Chucks1...
Q.  WHY  WAS THE  MOUSE  CRYING?
A.   HE  FOUND  OUT  HIS DAD  WAS  A  RAT.

 

TinaKay333
What has 4 legs but can't walk?

A chair.

What has 4 legs but can't walk?

A table.

What is black and white and read all over?

A newspaper.

From joke and riddle lover, Hagar H.
Why did the kid put sugar under his pillow?

So he would have sweet dreams (ha ha!)

Why did the farmer cross the road?  

To check on the chicks (ha ha!),

There were 3 people on a boat.   Their names were: Nobert, Nay, and Nothing. Nobert was interested in dolphins. Nay was interested in mermaids. Nothing was interested in nothing. One day Nobert saw a dolphin, so he jumped into the water and drowned. Another day Nay thought he saw a mermaid, so he dived into the water and also drowned. Who and what was left on the boat?

Nothing.

Why did the kid throw a bucket of water out the window?

He wanted to see a waterfall

Why did the kid throw a bucket of butter out the window?

He wanted to see a butterfly.

From Bob S.
Q: What doesn't get any wetter no matter how much it rains?

A: The ocean.

Q: A guy went out in pouring rain with no umbrella or hat or anything.  Not a hair on his head got wet. How come?
A: He was bald! He didn't have a hair on his head!  

From M AND M509...
What is an alligator's favorite drink???

Gatorade

Skidlydink sends...
What kind of cheese isn't yours?

Nacho cheese 

Barbara Milner, age 11, of Corning, CA
Q. What once was red that now is black?
A. A match.

Christina D., age 11, from Wilkes-Barre, Pa.
Q. WHY DID THE KID CROSS THE PARK?
A. TO GET TO THE OTHER SLIDE!!!!!!
HA! HA! HA!

Austin Banach, age 13 of Housatonic, MA
Q. Why are E.T's eyes so big?
A. Your eyes would be big too if you saw the size of his phone bill!

Shawn, age 12 from Philadelphia,PA
Q. Why did the cucumber blush?
A. It saw the salad dressing.

Adam, age 8, Rochester,NY
Q. Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
A. Because he was too chicken!!

Corinne Accardo, Age 7, of Mandeville, La
Q. How much do pirates pay for their earrings?
A. Buccaneer

Jiselle, Age 13 of Indiana
Q. When is a car not a car?
A. When it turns into a garage.

Kimberly Driver, Age 8 of New Palestine, IN sent this gross one...
Q. What happens when an elephant swallows you?
A. You run around until you get pooped out.

Tommy MCconnell, age 12 of Union City, Ind
You're so ugly your mama had to tie a steak to your neck so the dog would play with you.

Some 'Your Momma' jokes from Speedo-k

  • your momma is so fat she played pool with the planets.
  • your momma is so fat the last she saw 90210 was on her scale
  • your momma so fat that every time she walks the Richter scale reads 7.5

KNOCK KNOCK

From Jeramie... 

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Bob.
Bob who?
I do not have a last name. 

Great Grandma Hanson, age 98 from Greenbay, Wisconsin sent...

Knock-knock
Who's there?
Boo
Boo who?
Don't cry it's only me!

Michele, age 8 1/2 from Greendale, WI sent...

Knock-knock
Who's there?
Olive
Olive who?
I love you!

Chelsea, age 5 from Marshfield, WI wrote...

Knock-knock
Who's there?
banana.
Banana, who?
Knock-knock
Who's there?
banana.
Banana, who?
Knock-knock
Who's there?
banana.
Banana, who?
Knock-knock
Who's there?
orange.
Orange, who?
Orange you glad I didn't say banana again?

BLONDE JOKES

by: Lanny Lacey
A blonde was driving down the road on her way home from work. On the radio the announcer was listing a bunch of blonde jokes. "this is so discriminating" she thought to herself. She looked to her left and saw a blonde in a field trying to row a boat. "these people put a bad name for us" she thought, so she pulled over and shouted to the other blonde, "if I could swim I would go out there and tell you to stop making a fool of us!"

how do you drown a blonde?

put a scratch and sniff sticker on the bottom of the pool

what was a blonde invention?

solar powered flash light

Skidlydink sends...

One blond walks into a bar, another blond walks into a bar.  The first blond says " You didn't see it either?!"

A blond, a brunette and a red head just escaped from jail, So all of them ran into a bar, the brunette went behind a box, the red head went behind the door, and the blond went into a potato sack, the police came into the bar and kicked the box, the brunette said "arf" so they thought it was a dog, the police kicked the door and the red head said"meow" so they thought it was a cat, the police kicked the potato sack and the blond said "potato!"

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